those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize
