the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Randomize
