I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
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