If i come over, it means nothing
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
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