fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
the day after is always just damage control
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize