Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Randomize
