He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
