i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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