That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize