With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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