I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
