Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
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