I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
