no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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