Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
My underwear smells like fireworks.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Randomize
