didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
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Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
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I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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