Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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