just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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