I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
How does it feel to date your dad?
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
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