Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
tell your sister to shave her snatch
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
operation harelip BJ is a go
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize