yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Randomize
