garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
I got inside last night via doggy door
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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