i don't like sucking hair
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
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