Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I can't trust your balls anymore.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
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