I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize