Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
never play flip cup with pint glasses
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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