I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Randomize
