just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
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