oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
21 Of The Most Regrettable Tattoo Ideas Ever
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.