Well apparently he's into motor boating.
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Randomize