A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
