sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Last time i carry you out of a forest
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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