i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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