she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
you made out with another girl for some wings
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize