Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(703): View more from Virginia

So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?

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(239): View more from Florida

so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...

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(706): View more from Georgia

lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.

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(440): View more from Ohio

I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
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(253): View more from Washington

they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.

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(312): View more from Illinois

I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.

(224): View more from Illinois

Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.

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(616): View more from Michigan

At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head

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(325): View more from Texas

Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.

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(802): View more from Vermont

Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE

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