Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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