she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize