that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
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