Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
