I hope mine doesn't look like that
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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