this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Use "feeling words"
Yay
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize