Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
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