is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he puts the penis in happiness.
My underwear smells like fireworks.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
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