If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
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