Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
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