So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
