She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
