living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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