I smell stomach acid.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
