I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize