Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...

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  (202): You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell... http://tfl.nu/oe10
  Replies (8) Good night (650) Bad night (1897)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with

  (217): View more from Illinois

  well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment

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  (610): thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with (217): well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment http://tfl.nu/vbkf
  Replies (23) Good night (1516) Bad night (2437)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.

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  (570): we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up. http://tfl.nu/su5y
  Replies (20) Good night (3811) Bad night (493)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson

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  (570): I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson http://tfl.nu/24on
  Replies (72) Good night (1233) Bad night (3697)
• Favorite

  (912): View more from Georgia

  I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.

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  (912): I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection. http://tfl.nu/273s
  Replies (17) Good night (4494) Bad night (1043)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  Sadness tears and throw up everywhere

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  (916): Sadness tears and throw up everywhere http://tfl.nu/ierj
  Replies (5) Good night (735) Bad night (2168)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.

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  (602): literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk. http://tfl.nu/38ru
  Replies (9) Good night (2022) Bad night (719)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.

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  (585): He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working. http://tfl.nu/9caj
  Replies (8) Good night (4544) Bad night (691)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot

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  (404): the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot http://tfl.nu/9cq3
  Replies (5) Good night (1459) Bad night (548)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.

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  (540): He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back. http://tfl.nu/es5h
  Replies (14) Good night (1585) Bad night (454)
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.

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  (604): The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why. http://tfl.nu/zoqm
  Replies (8) Good night (961) Bad night (601)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches

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  (248): We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches http://tfl.nu/48qq
  Replies (4) Good night (1030) Bad night (447)
• Favorite

  (915): View more from Texas

  Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired

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  (915): Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired http://tfl.nu/r2a7
  Replies (5) Good night (851) Bad night (1583)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.

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  (412): Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face. http://tfl.nu/ja8q
  Replies (1) Good night (205) Bad night (435)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk

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  (248): His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk http://tfl.nu/d0l5
  Replies (0) Good night (547) Bad night (309)

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