You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
