Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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