Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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